Who takes the prize for 'Malaysia Tak Boleh'?

Your candidate is as good as mine, but this being April there are very many contenders for the dubious honour.

Is it the cabinet minister who agreed with a tweet that described the tragedy of MH370 as a "blessing in disguise"?

Is it another minister who proposed changing the voting system along racial lines as a way to "resolve racial conflict"?

Is it yet another minister who said that the kidnappers of two women from a Sabah island resort had demanded a ransom of 500 million pesos (about RM36.5 million) for the Chinese national?

Is it the former minister who suggested that erstwhile prime minister Tun Dr Mahathir Mohamad be brought back into the government as minister mentor?

Is it "Malaysia Boleh's" top cop who cannot investigate a father for abducting his six-year-old son despite a High Court order granting his ex-wife custody of their two children?

If it is none of the above, then it must be "Malaysia Boleh's" chief prosecutor who has again outsourced the prosecution of a government case to a private sector lawyer.

Or the polygamous parliamentarian who took offence at his fellow MP's attire.

Or the magistrate who not only jailed a Bangladeshi worker but ordered that he be given three strokes of the rotan despite the 28-year-old having a valid work permit.

Result? The worker is suing for RM3 million - RM1 million for each stroke!

In no particular order, here's a quick look at each of the top five candidates:

Candidate #1: Acting Transport Minister Datuk Seri Hishammuddin Hussein, who has been in the limelight for his crisis management of the multinational search for the missing Malaysia Airlines Boeing 777-200ER.

He had previously responded to criticisms of the search effort by retorting: "It's only confusion if you want it to be seen to be confusion."

Recently, he shocked people by responding to an inappropriate tweet sent by a Bernama journalist.

The tweet said: "MH370 is a blessing in disguise for all of us. I understand now the beauty of unity, the sweetness of having each other."

Only six minutes later, Hishammuddin responded: "Right u are :)"

After coming under attack on social media, the minister removed his comment, and the journalist deleted his original tweet and apologised.

Candidate #2: Minister in the Prime Minister's Department Datuk Seri Shahidan Kassim, who suggested that Malays, Chinese and Indians should vote for candidates of their own race calling it "One Vote, One Person, Based on Race".

He said that the concept of "one man, one vote" is problematic for Malaysia due to its multiracial composition.

"We won't have any racial conflict or disputing the prime minister or the king till the end of the world," he added.

Candidate #3: Home Minister Datuk Seri Zahid Hamidi.

China is puzzled by the atrocious 500 million pesos ransom demand for the release of its national abducted from Semporna.

Zahid had disclosed the amount sought by the abductors for the release of the 28-year-old Chinese tourist.

He said that no demand was made for the Filipina resort worker who was kidnapped at the same time.

Candidate #4: Former de facto law minister Datuk Zaid Ibrahim, who made his baffling proposal that Mahathir be appointed as minister mentor.

He said that while Prime Minister Datuk Seri Najib Razak focuses on his economic and financial transformation plans, the former premier could look after education, bring back racial unity and resolve religious and other "sensitive" issues.

Say that again?

Candidate #5: Inspector-General of Police Tan Sri Khalid Abu Bakar.

Zaid and another former de facto law minister, Datuk Seri Nazri Aziz, criticised the police for failing to act against what the latter called the "kidnapping" of the boy by the Muslim convert father.

He said police should have never given the impression that they would not act because there were two different court orders.

Nazri, now tourism minister, said the father was clearly violating the High Court’s decision to award full custody of the children to his ex-wife.

Khalid had said that "there are two court orders -- civil and Syariah. In this case, it is best if the two can settle their problem".

DAP leader Lim Kit Siang told the IGP to quit if he won't do his job.

So much for the top five candidates in who takes the prize for "Malaysia Tak Boleh".

Next week, we shall look at the cases of the outsourcing Attorney-General, the polygamous MP, and the hapless Magistrate. Plus other qualifiers on the growing list of contenders.

Mind you, we are still in April. Candidates galore.

Tan Jooi Long resigned as an editor in Bernama to head the Asia Pacific operations of a U.S.-based newswire. He is a prolific tweeter.

The Ant Daily